The TriadCity Adventurer

Interview With the Vampire

By Occam
Month of Goats 27, Year of the Dragon 7

Believe you me, I felt my horse and cart thump as I climbed those stairs. Heard the rush, felt the pulse. Fit to alley, I don't mind to admit, and a rough house of it. Some bleeding thing up there wants me for pudding. Bloody hell.

Why I paid such little bacon to decor is your sweet Tess and mine. You'd think I'd be gobsmacked by the penthouse of the bloody Ba Pef Hotel. No, not by that. By my hostess, who was so... so... compelling. I could look only to her, and though by Tom Jones I can't say what she looks like, I can testify that I've seen her everywhere in TriadCity, and so have you.

Occam:  The Central Computer itself has guaranteed my safety...

Vampire:  Now, now. [Her voice is soothing, like a mother comforting a frightened child.] You're my guest! Have some ginger ale.

Occam:  I was expecting...

Vampire:  Bloody marys? Blood sausage, blood pudding? I'm a strict vegan. Would you like some celery?

more